Blah two weeks

The past two weeks have just been horrible. I have been irritable every single day. Everything anyone does just irritates the heck out of me, especially my loving boyfriend. I know he's just trying to help, but man, everything he does just drives me crazy. And the thing that really sucks is that I know it's me; I know that he's not doing anything differently, well besides taking a break, but more about that in a minute. It's just that everything he always does just happens to be bothering me right now. When I went to see the doctor, he put me on the Lamictal starter pack. I'm supposed to take 25mg for the first two weeks, then 50mg for the next two weeks and on and on until I get to the dosage I'm supposed to be on. You have to do this because apparently if you take the medicine too fast you can develop a fatal rash. But it sucks because I'm not seeing any results so far. And now my boyfriend has decided that I'm too crazy and that he can't stand to be around me like this anymore and that he's been patient enough but that now he's going to wait until my medicine kicks in to get back with me. This, of course, just made me absolutely livid and so I"m crying and screaming and having an episode all over again. This is NOT helping. And this just makes me want to be normal more than ever, to just be able to control my behavior, to stop acting like a spoiled child. But no matter what I do or how hard I try or what resolutions I make, I just can't do it. I don't want to be bipolar, I don't want to have to take a break from my boyfriend because I'm so freaking crazy. This sucks. Thank God I'm going to see the doctor on Thursday.