Yay! My boyfriend's back

Everything's good right now, my boyfriend and I are back together. Well, except that I'm really sick, now I have a fever and can hardly get out of bed. I fell like shit and I've been to the doctor, but nothing seems to be improving. I keep going back but I'm starting to feel like a hypochondriac. Every time I go, he just tells me to keep taking my medicine. But I'm still not getting better. I feel worse, actually. As far as my moods, things have been ok. I still feel a little shaky or like I'm on thin ice, like everything could fall apart at any minute but I'm managing to hold it together for now. I'm still feeling irritable now, I'm just better able to control it. Well maybe not control it, but keep it from ruining my life. I'm still on the 50mg of Lamictal that I started Sunday and it's kind of starting to kick in, I'm having more good days, at least.

still without boyfriend

I had thought this would be over by now, he never takes this long to come back. He says he wants me to stabilize and for my medication to kick in so that he doesn't have to leave me for good. This doesn't make sense to me, because I think that a boyfriend should be there for his girlfriend through thick and thin, not just when it's easy. You can't just give up when it's tough and think "oh, I'll wait it out until things get better." You're there to be supportive and loving and understanding. If I had cancer, he wouldn't abandon me. And besides if he was doing the same things, I would be there for him, so why isn't he there for me. Ughh sorry I'm ranting. I'm also sick. I started to feel bad Wednesday night. When is this medicine going to kick in and I'm going to start feeling better? I'm miserable and I don't know what to do with myself. I mean, I usually spend all day either with him or talking to him, and now I'm doing neither so I don't know what to do. He usually comes by my house everymorning to tell me hello and give me a kiss before he goes off to work. Now, even though he's not, I get very excited when the dogs start barking or whining, because I think it might be him. But it never is.